A Spell to End School

As requested by Katy, here is a poem I wrote in primary school, which was published in All Aboard For Lancashire. I suspect if I was at school now I’d get called in under the government’s Prevent program for writing a poem about exploding the school, not to mention the wrath of the RSPCA for the various ingredients.

Round the size six cauldron go
A warthog’s eye and a green frog’s toe
Stir it well for exactly one hour
But make sure you don’t drink it, it’s very sour!

Hubble hubble bubble bubble
Evil potion stir up some trouble

Into the pot goes a wild bee’s sting
An elephant’s tusk and an eagle’s wing
Boil it all over a red hot fire
Then throw in a piece of electric wire

Hubble hubble bubble bubble
Cooking pot stir up some trouble

Leave the potion for two hours to set
Then come back and see if it’s still wet
If it is the magic has worked well within
But if it’s gone hard then throw it in the bin!

Hubble hubble bubble bubble
Secret spell stir up some trouble

Then pour the liquid all over the school
Stand well back, don’t be a fool
In ten seconds the school will explode
And send you flying down the road!